IV class '08

Freshman year: Fall Con 2004










Senior Year: Summer Con 2008










Just thought you guys would enjoy these pics =P

Hope

Thanks for the continued reminder of hope. =) I need it.

UGH!

I HATE feeling this way. I thought I was getting past this, but apparently I'm not and it's way too hard cuz i'm totally, constantly, always surrounded by it. MAKE IT GO AWAY! which would be kinda impossible cuz then you would hafta make the people go away....

Taylor Swift - "White Horse"

Say you're sorry
That face of an angel
Comes out just when you need it to
As I paced back and forth all this time
Cause I honestly believed in you
Holding on
The days drag on
Stupid girl,
I should have known, I should have known

[Chorus]
I'm not a princess, this ain't a fairy tale
I'm not the one you'll sweep off her feet,
Lead her up the stairwell
This ain't Hollywood, this is a small town,
I was a dreamer before you went and let me down
Now it's too late for you
And your white horse, to come around

Baby I was naive,
Got lost in your eyes
And never really had a chance
I had so many dreams
About you and me
Happy endings
Now I know

[Chorus]
I'm not a princess, this ain't a fairy tale
I'm not the one you'll sweep off her feet,
Lead her up the stairwell
This ain't Hollywood, this is a small town,
I was a dreamer before you went and let me down
Now it's too late for you
And your white horse, to come around

And there you are on your knees,
Begging for forgiveness, begging for me
Just like I always wanted but I'm sooo sorry

Cause I'm not your princess, this ain't a fairytale
I'm gonna find someone someday who might actually treat me well
This is a big world, that was a small town
There in my rearview mirror disappearing now
And its too late for you and your white horse
Now its too late for you and your white horse, to catch me now

Heart Ache

Today I said bye to the one thing I love most in the entire world, the one thing that always makes me happy no matter what I'm going thru. She was the one comforter that I knew would never fail me, or leave me (except for the day like today). And the only one that I knew loves me as much as I love her. She's been with me for 15 years. Today I watched her get sleepy and fade away from this world... right in front of me.

It seems that before I can heal from one thing, another thing tears me up. I hope nothing else comes up or I don't think I can handle it...

Friends

i'm so grateful for all you guys that are constantly there for me, especially right now when my whole world is so unstable and seems to be crumbling. thank you so much for all your support and prayers. i know for a fact that i wouldn't be here, fighting and surviving, if you guys weren't here with me to lift me up as i'm falling.

Support

now is when i need you the most, but you aren't there...

Heart Break

my heart is slowly breaking apart...piece by piece.

my world is
f
a
l
l
i
n
g
apart

5000 Small Group

The trick is to keep breathing.

Catalyst

Heart racing... not enough oxygen... trying to catch my breath....

Broken Trust

throughout hs i've always had issues with trusting people, from broken friendships and broken hearts. each time in a new relationship with anyone i put up a shield to protect myself, and it seems that each time i slowly open myself to a person and eventually completely put down my shield, that person dissappoints me in some way (not saying this happens to everyone i know, but more so than i'd like).

however, throughout college, i've learned about Jesus' love for me and for others. i want to love others as Jesus loves us, and am continuing in that pursuit. i've learned to open myself up more and to trust people more even though sometimes it is still hard. I know that i still try to protect myself and when i completely put my shield down i will get hurt, but i'm starting to accept it, starting to be healed from it by thinking about Jesus' love for me, and knowing that no matter how much i get hurt from others it doesn't matter cuz all i need is Him. He's the only one that fills me completely and meets/exceeds all my expectations.

Dreamless

Dear God,
Please take these dreams (thoughts) away from me, so I can feel rested when I wake up and without the urge to cry.

The Start of Something New

first blog since 2006:

so i started reading my old blog and it was super lame, and i'd be embarassed for people to read it, so i decided to start a completely new one. a clean page, a clean start (in every way). i'm not a writer so who knows how long/how often i'll be posting, and i bet my postings will not be interesting, i guess more like a personal journal for myself, and anyone else who wants to read about my life and what i go thru.

each day, especially these days i just thank God for always being there for me. when i get disappointed in people, frustrated, or feeling the love they have for me....i keep in mind that everything is in His plan. every. little. thing. He has the perfect plan, and knows what's going to make me happy. even tho it may not be right at this instant, but it's there, Him fulfilling my every need, filling my heart. His plan is my plan.